Monday, October 06, 2003

Spending Money on Rover a Sin?

Taking time out from their busy schedule trying to determine how many angels can dance on the head of a pin, the Jesuits (Society of Jesus,) have raised an issue that is sure to raise the hackles of pet lovers.

The Jesuit published magazine Civilta Cattolica, whose contents are approved by the Vatican, denounced the spending of "good money" on outlandish pet foods, referring to the practice as "mad" and "morally condemnatory". The article also condemned those who "dress their pets in designer coats." I'm sure my cat would be in agreement on the final point, concluding that hell wouldn't be hot enough for anyone trying to make him wear a coat.

They went on to state that animals have no souls or rights; "Animals don't have rights, because these belong to Man." Perhaps realizing they had now thrown the gauntlet down to feminists as well as pet lovers, the article further explained; by the word "Man" it is meant a "person, an intelligent and free being, which is conscious and responsible, and blessed with a spiritual soul."

With these rhetorical skills, there is little wonder as to why they are celibate. In fairness, they did recommend that the "money be far better spent on far nobler causes, such as feeding children in the Third World." This did not mean that Man could "maltreat animals or make them suffer. He instead must look after them, since he is not their owner, but the custodian and administrator of creation."

I think I am going to have a nameplate made:

Barney F. McClelland
Custodian and Administrator of Creation

It would certainly give me that air of importance to my desk I've been seeking. But, I digress…

Apparently, the boys aren't too keen on their timing either. The release of the article was October 4th, the feast day of St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals.

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